By Courtney
I recently read a book that may be helpful to foster parents. It is titled as The No-Nonsense Guide to Foster Parenting by Barbara Hughes. You may find yourself wondering if you even have time to read a book on top of all you do, but don’t worry, this book is a quick read. One reason I chose this book was because of Hughes’ credibility. She has been a foster parent for over twenty years. She understands what it is like for new foster parents as well as those more seasoned. She writes in a manner that is to the point and brief. She shares, “This book is written for the many foster parents searching for practical solutions…try them out, adjust as needed to suit the situation, and remember that the best approach to foster parenting is nothing more than common sense, basic rules, and having the ability to laugh from time to time” (Hughes, 2010). As you read through the pages, you may find comfort in her stories and advice because she has been exactly where you are. She is real and honest in her approach yet heartfelt throughout.
Hughes offers eight chapters of advice. They are as follows:
1. Definition of Foster Parenting: Hughes shares her take on what foster parenting is and isn’t in a witty way. She then offers the “Foster Parenting Virtues” she came up for a true definition and focus for foster parents.
2. Dealing with Emotions: This may be what many foster parents find the most challenging. Hughes gives a personal story that shows foster parents need to respect each child and not blame them for poor behavior or emotions realizing their backgrounds and emotions. They need someone to believe in them. Have open communication, place yourself in their shoes, have a good support system, and know when to take a break—good points to think about.
3. Adjusting to New Rules: Hughes begins this chapter by sharing a story to emphasize that foster parents shouldn’t be drill sergeants. How a child is welcomed into a home can make a huge difference. Here she offers advice on making this transition the best possible.
4. On Medications: This chapter is all about how to handle the medication process that foster children may have. Many come with prescribed medications, and it is an important responsibility to see that you manage them correctly as well as watch for side-effects with changes.
5. Practical Solutions to Everyday Issues: From diet to bedwetting or school work to supervision issues, Hughes shares simple bullet point tips for foster parents that focus on day to day life concerns.
6. Addressing Behavior Concerns: Another important topic for foster parents, Hughes shares ideas on areas such as what to do when curfew is broken, or a child acts out at school, and remembering to see the positive behavior in children. She emphasizes getting to know the child and understanding what typical behavior is for them.
7. Interactions with the System: This chapter offers advice on how to work with caseworkers and other team members, even when they may be troublesome.
8. Getting Help: “Asking for help does not mean that you shouldn’t be a foster parent; it means you want to do right by the kids who are placed in your home” (Hughes, 2010). Need I explain more? Don’t be afraid to ask for help, and be sure you recognize and receive good trainings. These are the focus points of the last chapter.
Overall, her book is worth a read. If you are hoping for more detailed stories and insight, you may want to consider another book. However, I'd say that it is a good quick go-to guide for foster parents; it can also be a useful tool for those who are new to foster parenting in offering advice and perhaps preventing some struggle situations before they occur.
Hughes, B. (2010). The no-nonsense guide to foster parenting. USA: Wasteland Press.
This sounds like a great day to day book for issues with foster care. It seems like it covers a lot of topics and that the author has a lot of experience. I enjoy books that are too the point and short. Thanks for the book review.
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